A Fine Madness

Twitter Braindump Roundup

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

10:42 I would like to think St. Peter was just minding his business, head in that giant book. Fell out his chair by the booming "BILLY MAYS HERE!" #
18:03 Not that anyone cares about what I think, but Janet should get the kids. Team Anyone-But-Joe. #

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Mon, 29 Jun 2009 00:30:03 GMT

22:11 The Jordan Chandler rumor is untrue until someone can find a more credible source than a 2 day old blog whch messes the names up. #
23:20 lol the Bashir documentary. The shopping spree in Las Vegas. #
23:52 @irnbruise. it's on msnbc right now. #
05:17 About how surreal do you think the rest of you day will turn if you way up to Muse's "Blackout"? #
05:19 ok that last status made no sense. i guess i answered my own question. #
08:24 @venom4u. You're not the boss of me!!! I can be up at all hours twittering if I... *opened mouthed ZZZZZZZZZZZZ* #
10:04 Off to MENY Brunch then to march in Pride! See you there! #
11:29 UPDATE: The Bridesmaids are already drunk. Rod has a flask do we'll be good on route. We're near the front so don't miss us. Then Trump. #
14:07 Evidently the universal uniform og Pride is No Shirt. Yes on the float. Now stalled at 8th St. #
14:10 Pride is awesome. #
15:09 ok so since we were near the front, we're done with the parade. Catching a drink at Jeremy's Slaughtered Lamb if y'alls want to stop by. #
15:20 fyi Billy Mays was my household cleaning boyfriend so this is devestating. Meanwhile the Sham Wow guy alive to smack up hookers, Billy dead #
15:35 Ok. The Lesbians done did took over this end of the bar. They're fun but we need more liquor. Jeremy, you should take over the status now. #
16:47 now walking to the Trump party. CATCH UP, BISHES! #
17:11 ok so this party at thr trump modeling agency is fire. 3 floors up people hanging outside windows. drinking lambic. good day #
17:31 lol the cops are here not in a good way #
20:29 Today was a beautiful day for a parade. Home now. Showered. Achy everywhere. Watching The Notebook give me an unromanced sad. #

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Sun, 28 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

20:47 I'm in so much ache that I'm going for a shiatsu tonight. I need some walking on my back. Yes, I pay people to touch me. Don't judge. #
21:13 ok maybe ive been too harsh before. joy jones just talked some empathy into me and my cold salty heart. #
21:17 at la linea with duke and joy. they're playing mj videos and she and i are singing along. #
21:21 ok so they're starting this chronicalogically beginning of course wuth Jackson 5. jamming on it. #
09:32 TV free weekend. I don't need the oversaturation. Amazing how he could still be a polarizing figure. Everyone all in agreement up until 1993 #
17:10 @jerem_morrow. I thoroughly approve. #

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Sat, 27 Jun 2009 00:30:03 GMT

21:08 I dunno... #
21:56 well msnbc followed the helicopter fling the body away and then filmed the white sheeted body being moved to the coroners van. pretty morbid #
23:11 @Jerem_Morrow. Well done. Truth in a few lines. #
23:17 Today Leah helped me sexy up some letters. Had an excellent catch up dinner with Kirsten. I have some great, supportive friends. #
07:44 Is there any else on TV? #
07:46 dave chapelle michael jackson #
07:47 oops. i thought i was googling. sorry #
09:35 @pwcaulfield. My condolences to your family. It was really hard on her when my mom's best friend died a few years back. #
11:12 I'm totally sorry I won't be able to see @anamariecox sub in for Rachel Maddow tonight. It would have been awesome. #
11:34 @pwcaulfield. I think the MJ coverage will be pre-empting her. #
11:35 @changebumpin. What in the world does church and state have to do with this? #
11:44 @changebumpin. O.O #
14:01 @anamariecox. I <3 you. #
16:38 @DavidShuster. I <3 you, too. #
19:39 @johncmayer. I believe you can buy a Thriller at Babeland and you can plug it into the wall. #

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Fri, 26 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

09:28 operationbeautiful.com/ #
17:26 I'm guessing it was Bubbles, in the "play" room, with the Jesus Juice. #
17:44 OK HE DIED. WOW. #
17:48 @jrinrevision. If he's dead then I'll be the first one to admit I'm a jerk. But after all his past drama, who would have though this was IT? #

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Twitter Braindump Roundup

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

21:48 Dag. Those couples on those eHarmony commercials look so pretty, happy and normal. Is it really as easy just like that? #
22:12 South Park. Butters is at Gay Rehab. #
08:45 Bullet fees to gain custody of your dead? I propose we now relabel Iran as NoHopeAtAllGhistan. #
08:46 @Ozzdo. Charlie Murphy was coming out with better stuff than Eddie back during Dave Chapelle while his brother was in a fat suit. #
09:13 You're a Gov. Go ghost. Don't transfer power to Lt. Gov. Cell off. YOU MISS FATHER'S DAY. And your first explanation is naked hiking? <3! #
12:30 @threeminuterule. Don't pry for me in Argentina. #
12:40 @pwcaulfield. We're in it this year. Care to join us? Or at least meet up at Jeremy's afterwards? #
14:18 Mark Sanford: dead hooker, second family or underaged boy? (I don't do football pools or anything like that so I need something to wager on) #
14:39 Mark Sanford admits to an affair. With an actual ADULT FEMALE. Boring. Weakest. Repub. Ever. I vote for a Sanford/Blago Buddy cop movie tho #
14:43 @threeminuterule. He didn't transfer power and ghosted. Of course someone would have said something. His wife obvs knew what was up. #
14:46 @equilibriumgirl. That's what people here are saying. @threeminuterule. Unless you're Blago, you can get away with a lot. Ref: Palin. #
15:11 @meganlibrarian. I love you. Do the due diligence. Bonus points if you find it's a she...MALE. Pics or it's wildcard. #
15:14 @equilibriumgirl. Why did you steal my thunder? #
15:56 @equilibriumgirl. You confirm "female". Hurt my soul. Again, still want pic proof with midwife's "was born female" guarantee. #
16:42 (Improvised singalong!) Don't cry about Argentina... #
16:47 @equilibriumgirl. But, hey what's up with God duuuuude... #
19:17 Ok these emails between Sanford and Evita are quite lovely. I'm jealous. No one writes me like this. tr.im/pEm8 #

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Wed, 24 Jun 2009 00:30:01 GMT

20:33 @sameres77. lol true on both replies. #
22:56 OK this Futurama movie is hilarious. #
10:56 I don't follow John Mayer, but his PerezHilton oh snap replies are excellent. I commend. bit.ly/19wl8c #
11:04 @meganlibrarian. Part of the full service I provide. How many sugars would you like in your coffee, Sugar? #
19:49 I had a good/crazy day today. Full of hope and possibilty, which is freaky. For a second there was a twinkle in my cold dark heart. YEESH! #
19:50 @untoward. My walls are filled with awesome, aren't they, Joey? #

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Tue, 23 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

01:47 Home by afternoon from long Sat. Shopping, brunch, passed out. Just woke, might as well start my Monday w/ chores. #
02:16 Had vivid dreams. I feel I must document the lessons they taught me. Bear with me. #
02:20 Evidently the holiday resulted in me dreaming of someone taking credit for something they never contributed to. Had him carted away. #
02:23 Because of today's memory lane, dreamt of someone promising something their heart wasn't in because they wanted me happy. IRL makes sensenow #
02:27 Then woke to Niecy Nash fussing at stubborn people on "Clean House" for them to declutter their lives. I find colorful symmetry in that. #
02:30 So, in sum, I would define this weekend as my Mental Staycation and it was both welcome and needed. Huzzahs! #
09:17 Just watched the video of Neda in Iran. I've never seen the face of someone dying like that. You can see the actual moment when she dies. #
09:18 The Iran Internal Conflict will accelerate since they now have Neda as their beautiful martyr, and rightly so. She died in her father's arms #
12:43 "Can't read my- Can't read my- No he can't read my poker face." This danged lyric is in my head all AM. Gee thanks, Lyssa and Kate. #
12:49 @venom4u. This song is from the devil. It's the "who let the dogs out" for 2009. #
13:00 @venom4u. What the hell is a "disco stick"? You know what? Forget I asked. Whoever this person is must be stopped. st-st-st-st-stopped. #
15:45 The nurse enters my exam room to give me an injection. "Left or right cheek," she asks while writing. Who with the what now? #
15:53 "What do you do for a living?" Nurse trying to distract me. Over my shoulder I reply "I sit on my ass all day!" She chuckles. I grit... #
15:55 RIGHT CHEEK!! #
17:01 @ambilevous. lol I'm sure your imagination is pic enough. #
17:01 Duke says I overshare. y/n? #
20:28 Tomorrow night's menu: Pernil. It needs to marinate overnight. Tonight? I dunno. Maybe fried eggplant? #

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Twitter Braindump Roundup

Mon, 22 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

21:57 lol just sang Rehab at Lyssa's karoke birthday #
01:36 At a brand new unsold condo bldg in Bk, the entire floor has doors open, dj music, people dancing. That's where you'll find me. #
03:47 Crashing in Bk. Good weekend so far, people. Let's keep it going. #
12:23 @you certainly do have the *nuts* for the challenge. bada bum *rimshot*. #
12:26 @untoward. That last one was for you. Oops. #
12:30 - often wonder whether what I do is brave or stupid. Perhaps they're the same? Maybe there's a third option: Pathetic? #
12:34 At any rate, it's a good day so far. See no reason for that to change unless... Zombies! #

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Sun, 21 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

22:25 i need to figure out how to juggle my social activities better. oi with this last minute running around sugar honey iced tea. #
09:14 On a Hamptons Jitney to LI. This ain't no Greyhound. Leather seat, tray, personal sound system, movie. OK wth bus ballin rollin on dubs, yo #
09:47 We're on way to North Fork on a wine tour and of course the "in-flight" movie is "Sideways". I'll be Miles sans the sad & Xanex & angst. #
09:55 @goons. yays, y'alls! I'll let you know how it goes and maybe we can do this together next time! #
14:28 On way to 3rd vineyard. A billion wines tasted. omg I'm on taste overload. pleeze halp. #
17:47 All my armor falling down in a pile at my feet. And my winter giving way to warm as I singing him to sleep. #

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Sat, 20 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

08:57 I foresee an upcoming turf war between Iran and Ireland over the brand of the color green. #
12:00 "Dr, I get sick when I eat raw cookie dough." "Maybe you shouldn't be eating raw cookie dough?" 60 people in 28 states RUIN IT for everyone #
12:04 @threeminuterule Dude, the whole refrigerating the stuff was news to me. Personally I smear on crackers topped w undercooked hamburger meat #
13:08 With the cookie dough recall I now have nothing to eat for lunch. What will I mindlessly nomnomnom on now? Ooh straight oreo filling! #

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Twitter Braindump Roundup

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

21:41 Fiddling w the BB I see you can voice record & assign. I'm thinking of creating an "Abre Los Ojos!" alarm. 1/3 of you will get that. #
07:55 Rainy mornings does not an early riser in me make. #
10:23 Hooooooly Shikeys! Jane Goodall is slated to appear at the 92nd St Y! Tony Blair too but DUDES! JANE GOODALL!! #
10:56 @Jerem_Morrow. You evidently need a vacay. If you and yours need a couch in NYC, let me know! #
11:08 Thank you Muslim Buddhist Taoist Jesus for not having a pilot die on me mid-flight. The non-stop turbulence doesn't seem as wack now. #
11:54 @jrinrevision. Meanwhile the plane hasn't even landed yet. How's that for realtime news? Amazing. #
11:56 Me: "So the plane is due to land at noon..." WorkPalAlex: "Wow. The pilot dies and it's still on time." Dark chuckle; sigh. END SCENE. #
12:09 ...aaaand the plane lands safely. OK, folks! Everyone back to their regularly scheduled workday ennui within your personal cubicle of meh! #
12:11 @meganlibrarian. Crazycakes. Oh and you weren't kidding this morning about the cranky train folk. I heard/saw 2 bitchouts. phew! #
17:36 Washington Post fires Froomkin? Dinosaur medium FAIL! #
18:31 @meganlibrarian. Get out of my head. You've been verbalizing my thoughts all day. #

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Thu, 18 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

23:56 Prob w/ me & new books is that i stop everything engrossed. nothing gets done. fyi, time travelers wife. #
09:32 I'm sort of relieved. The whole Obama vs. The Fly episode proves that he's not a secret Buddhist which was the concern, right? ...right? #
09:35 Though not totally impressed with Obama's almost-ninja-like Flyicide skills. Barry, snag one with a pair of chopsticks then I'll give props #
09:51 @irnbruise. www.obamasplanforgayrights.com #
10:33 @ambilevous. Technically he's a "half-breed muslin". www.cfnews13.com/News/Local/2008/9/10/obama_sign_in_yard_stirs_up_neighbors.html #
11:49 To say there are many paradoxes in "Time Traveler's Wife" would be like saying the Earth is elliptical, because it is, but it doesn't matter #

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Wed, 17 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

20:59 @AlexBalk. But South Park *does* speak truth to power. What's her point? Also, wicked fart jokes. What more? #
21:04 Menu: Slow roasted Pork Loin. Sauteed cucumbers w/ herbs. Dessert: Lemon Cupcakes. #
09:44 Watching the Simpsons remix "Sid and Nancy" using Lisa and the Ha-Ha Kid and substituting heroin for chocolate was surreal and amazing. #
12:02 Meanwhile... The Bridesmaids for MrrgeEq will be in Manhattan Pride next Saturday on a float. A friggin float. Maid Madness. Bwaha. #
14:46 Obama has asked Twitter to suspend their scheduled maintenance because of its importance to Iran. #
15:17 @irnbruise. Because I'm not a one-issue person and at least we can work with him until satisfied. Read: Guantanamo, SCOTUS, Foreign Pol... #
15:48 @irnbruise. I agree on how his 180 is a total a-hole move, totally. There's a lot going on and we have to work harder for what we want. #
16:20 I bought 3 books through Barnes & Noble online and it said it would arrive in 3 days. It just got here now. I'm yay'ing. #

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Tue, 16 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

21:41 I may have returned to the NYC, but I've left my voice back on the sands somewhere. For some, this is a SoBe Miracle. #
07:19 Nicely it seems the cold was in remission during the trip. From throat to the chest. And lolvoice. Work will be fun. #
09:28 www.facebook.com/jojodanceryourmomiscalling #

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Twitter Braindump Roundup

Mon, 15 Jun 2009 00:30:01 GMT

21:41 We were all in the water. The "shark" came back. They went to shore, I waded closer. My bio in < 100 characters. #
23:39 Carinda pressed my hair. Dana gave me egyptian eyes. Animal print dress. When in Vacation Rome... #
01:18 There is a big girl on the pole. This is in no way clever prose. In this club is a 300lb girl trying to work the stripper pole on the stage. #
01:30 I'm sitting in the middle of a couch. On the left of me a girl is giving a guy a lap dance. Not a stripper; just how folk dance on vacation. #
01:31 Reiteration: two out of three girls on this couch is not giving a lap dance. #
01:51 A guy's on the mike discussing the benefits of cunnilingus and fellatio. There's a lot going on in this club. I'm on the couch. #
01:54 Is this the first livetwit/FB if a club night? I would like to think so. Mark on the world and all... #
09:59 Smooched buhbai to D & S. Ate bfast w/ C. Shared a last hour in Sobe frowny face. Stole toilet paper. #
10:35 On Fri, a cab took us from airport to hotel. He said he'll get us at 10a. His name is Constant. Was there 9:45. Constant is consistent. #

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Sun, 14 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

10:04 We woke. Itinerary: *Eat. *Beach. Morning itinerary half done. #
12:31 So Saf and I were walking back with the next Wet Willies round. Carinda and Dana were like, dudes you totally missed the shark. Is that rite #

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Sat, 13 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

21:36 Sure I still have to pack. Still took time for beerw/grls. Came away with a poss kitchen apprntcshp w/ dessert hmewrk list. Tru. jstlikedat. #
21:39 @untoward. totally remember Friendster. lolsowack. I bet you don't remember BlackPlanet, and if you do then you and I need to talk. #
22:35 @untoward. Oddly, this answer satisfies me. #
08:52 No rain, no rainbows is something i would say if I were still in NYC. But I'm not. So I won't. Sup, Sun? #
19:23 What is the "Stanky Leg" and why am repeatedly asked to do it? #

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Fri, 12 Jun 2009 00:30:02 GMT

05:43 Being incredibly sick with no ability to take off means I am in no means ready for my flight in 24hrs. #
06:10 Can I clean my house, prep for Mom and Maids, do laundry and pack in 20hrs? Si. Si se puede, bishes. #

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Thu, 11 Jun 2009 00:25:23 GMT

This is the TEST shipment you asked for

00:25 I couldn't find a tweet to post for loudtwitter #
00:25 So I posted this. #

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In case you were wondering.

Fri, 05 Jun 2009 19:24:03 GMT

What I've been up to...

This is a window into my perfect world

Thu, 12 Mar 2009 19:20:59 GMT

EXCLUSIVE WATCHMAN FOOTAGE! SAVE YOUR $$! THANK ME LATER!

Fri, 06 Mar 2009 16:59:05 GMT

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 21:25:20 GMT

WHY IS SANJAY GUPTA SURGEON GENERAL?!?!

Barack, why you keep fucking with me? I'm starting to think that people were right about you. What next? Matlock as Attorney General?

Edit: FINE, OBAMA! We'll play your game!!

Suze Orman for SEC Chief!
Orville Reddenbacher for Agriculture Secretary!
Matlock for Attorney General!

Tue, 23 Dec 2008 19:43:46 GMT

A French guy lost $2 billion to Madoff and killed himself. This is all happening in my building right now.